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What happened to Dad?

Today it’s common to see the father’s role disparaged in media, many times making him out to be a bumbling, inept fool while the children are saved by an almost superhuman mother. This is a subtle but withering attack on the proper role of the father. “The effect of filling our childrens’ heads with negative images of fathers, of ignoring men who share equally in raising their children”, says Dr. Ross Parke, “and of showing nothing but part-time or no-time father is, quite simply, devastating” (Throwaway Dads, 1999, p. 81)

Modern literature thrives on this caricature of the father figure. Books such as Raising Boys Without Men exemplify this radical vision of children not needing fathers. Yet, when we see the statistics on how hedonistic and dysfunctional society is becoming by following such ideas, we ask, Where have all the fathers gone? Where is their leadership? The answer? Many have selfishly deserted their responsibilities. But others have been cowed by today’s liberal, morally relativistic culture and have slowly relinquished their God-given roles as providers, protectors, teachers and nurturers.

A particular unsettling passage from the book of Isaiah describes society not only as it was in Isaiah’s day but prophetically as it would be at the time before Christ’s return. It is eerily similar to what we see today: “I will give children to their princes, and babes shall rule over them. He people will be oppressed, every one by another and every one by his neighbour; the child will be insolent toward the elder and the base toward the honourable… The look on their countenance witnesses against them, and they declare their sin as Sodom; they do not hide it. Woe to their soul! For they have brought evil upon themselves…As for My people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them” (Isaiah 3:4-5, 9, 12)

Yes, it was prophesied that the father’s role would one day be mostly forfeited in the face of an increasingly blind and lawless society. “Much of our national discussion on youth crime”, writes sociologist David Blankenhorn, ”simply ignores the elephant in the room called “fatherlessness”. Moreover, many analysts come quite close to viewing all traditional norms of fatherhood not as a remedy for the problem of youth violence but rather as a leading cause of it” (“Fatherless America, 1995. p. 29).

So we have a duty to resist following society’s evil ways. One crucial was is by strengthening the family unit as best we can.

We must realize the importance both the father and the mother have in properly rearing children and not give in to the false notions commonly presented that alternative lifestyle parenting is just as good.


(Good News, A magazine of understanding, May-June 2006 Volume 11, Number 3, p. 6)

March 22, 2007 | 12:41 AM Comments  3 comments

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shorty667 Angie
March 22, 2007 | 1:14 PM

For the majority of my childhood, I had to grow up without my father..It's particularly difficult to understand when you're a child. The fact is..one minute he's with you and then (reasons unknown to yourself..) the next minute he's gone..
All sorts of questions go through your mind..Will I ever see him again? Whos fault is it? How long has he gone for? Too many questions unanswered.. I asked this same question to my mother over and over ''what happened to Dad?''..but because I was a child, my mother always gave me an excuse..thinking that would be enough to put my mind at rest. It was never enough..
Its so sad..the breakdown of a partnership can injure a child in such a way that it may affect them for the rest of their lives..
There's no doubt..being raised with both parents gives a child all the stability it needs to grow up in a healthy, loving environment..
However..it's not always possible :(
Antoinette2006 antoinette
March 22, 2007 | 6:34 PM

True Angie. In this text that I've been reading, it says a lot about how fathers today are portrayed as unimportant, when really, by all means, fathers are just as important as mothers. I felt deeply for the my daughter's daddy, my partner (at that time), just feeling that he doesn't think he's as important or special to my daughter as much as mum (me). In PNG we leave the mothers to do most of the parenting, maybe it's cultural, but fathers aren't just the bread-winners, (and they're not the only ones too) they're parents just like all the mummys.

I guess by all means, women and men are equal, even at home in our families. I used to think that all my daughter needed was mummy, and all mummy needed was a good job to keep my little family going. But by thinking that, I lost sight of the importance of fathers.

I grew up with both parents, and of course, as a child, I had love and attention from both, but as I grew older, they had less time for me and for my siblings. Running the family business to much of their time, attention and patience. I guess that's where I searched elsewhere for love, encouragement and support, and now I have a beautiful little girl.

I never realised how 'important' fathers are till I lost my daughters. I guess what's more important to me now, knowing His value in society and family, I have to let him do his part in rearing our child.
Antoinette2006 antoinette
April 2, 2007 | 10:52 PM
just a thought
i never thought that I'd ever ask this question. But, just out of curiosity, what's a life without your biological mother?

:(
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