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Antoinette's Blog
Mother alone
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It’s all so confusing. Not knowing what to believe. My partner (at that time) and I had a relationship that he believed was strong and swore it was the real thing. He pledged his love for me and the next thing you know it, I was a month pregnant with his child. He told me he deliberately gave us this child because he loved me and wanted to be with me and our children forever. I carried the child, believing that he loved me that much. I gave birth, and learned that he still wanted us so much to be together, so, like any other mother in love with Child and Father, I kept the family going. I introduced them to each other and taught my daughter to accept him over the years. I gave her excuses as to why he didn’t come and see her, hoping that she wouldn’t think badly of him. He met someone new while he was still loving me, and has decided to leave me, now it seems like it’s because of her, even though he told me that it was me. He told me that he was never going to leave me or my daughter, even though he was already with the other woman. He told me he wouldn’t see other women, or be with other women, but how can I ever believe any more of his empty promises. He made an Oath to God, Pledging his love and support and commitment to me and our little family while I was pregnant and then for the following four years, but now, he’s left…left me with a child that he deliberately brought to keep us together. The child is here now, and is no more a reason for love and honour or family. I feel like I was used and tricked. I believed that he was a God-fearing man, as he would never make promises to God and not be faithful to them. But I love him and our family and I there’s only thing that I can do, and that’s to keep loving him. Did he use me? Was it that bad that he had bring our daughter into half a family. Why did he lie? Why did he make those promises to God, to me, to our families and our daughter? Are all men like this? Why would he do such a thing? These are just my thoughts. I can’t imagine anyone ever knowing the answers.
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| March 15, 2007 | 10:35 PM |
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Comments
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antoinette,
my heart goes out to you. all i can say for sure is there are no mistakes in life. in the midst of difficulties, one thing always remains the same: God's love for you. no matter the trial, i hope that you will cling to God for comfort. Psalm 91 is a great chapter in the Bible for comfort:
v.14-16: The Lord says I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue them and honor them. I will satisfy them with a long life and give them my salvation."
keep the faith.
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Thanks Cassandra. I am turning Home. I'd like to believe that there are no mistakes in life, but what of the mistake that he thinks he made? I will never know why?
antoinette
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Mother alone
I can relate to your pain. I was once in your situation having a baby out of LOVE I thought. Giving my all to this man. And, really not paying attention to the signs of the man’s behavior. It felt like he had turned his back on me and our child. It was very hard to separate what is and what is not. Sometimes, Antoinette GOD will give us our heart desires. When we operate in the will of God's perfect will for us? God will not over ride our will. But he will allow us to go through choices we make. To see our mistake in our decision making. And what he has for us is much better anyway. We as women should seek GOD first when choosing our mates. In Jeremiah 17:9 (The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?) I the LORD search the heart, I try the reins, even to give every man according to his ways, and according to the fruit of his doings. Question: Did he have the fruit of the spirit which includes, Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. My advice to you is to seek GOD first always. And he will answer you right on time…
Friend in Christ
UFJ Member/Dianne
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A faithful mother and her unique baby...
Dear Antoinette, you have already done lots of things for him... the most important thing, you gave a birth from him... If he really loves you, how can he leave you and that innocent,sweet baby? Please, never allow him to makes you upset... Life is too short... I hope he will understand your value, and be back to you... May God give you and your baby a very happy, healthy, peaceful, long life with your baby's father or without him... Take care
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thanks Esra, I think he's lost confidence in our little family and himself, being young and not being able to give all that a family deserves and needs. i guess we both need a lot encouragement from ... each other??? My daughter and I are praying for his return, do you suppose God wills for families to be broken?
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Not Alone.....
My dear, i'd be shamed to write u in the pretence of being righteous, n guilt-free. i honestly cant imagine all u've been thru, & the truth is; I don't know how u've been holding up. However, i've gat to let u know that God never left ANY of ur detail to chance. He saw u go thru those trials, waited on u to turn to him 4 help and has never left u.
Its painful to imagine that God watched u suffer n didn't do anything to help. U know, I've been there myself and wat i learnt is that we are NEVER alone. God was there. Alwayz there.... He only needs us to sincerely admit our wrong n weaknesses then faithfully lean on his strength. This might sound outrageous, but it is a tasking major step to healing ur heartache.
In sincerity u've gat to seek God. U know, the heart of every man is in God's hands and He could turn it wheresoever it pleases him. So, if u r God's personal person, God will turn hearts of even kings to favor u (all according to his will)..
The question is Wat du u believe???? Do u believe God has better things in store for u? Do u want to trust God totally and let his will be done?
This might annoy u but our happiness relays on our dependence on Christ. U can doubt all u want (i know wat its like) but we cant change the fact the we can ONLY find pemanent bliss when we cling to God.
God can take u out and give u ur hearts desires. But are ur desires according to his will? i know how much most mothers want to have a family with their baby's daddy n i've also lost count of mothers that have been killed by their baby's daddy.
I'm not being inconsiderate but the list is endless. Thru it all always REMEMBER, God has plans to bring u to an xpected end. It might take years n things might take a different turn but the word of God will not come back void. Only believe that u are never alone.. May God show u mercies jus like he's showing me.........
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In good timing, I thought God would never hear or respond to my daughters/my prayers and tears. Infidelity.... why do things have to be this way. I almost jumped of the building today....a few hours ago.....cos I felt God didn't care about my family or my daughter, or even me.
aa
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In no condition you should loose hope in God because He was the one that created you and will never allow difficults more than you, in every problem there is always solution....just get down with your bible and believe everything you see in there....seeing your problems melting away like candle wax..Don't worry over your problem so that it don't lay you down...get a positive thinking over the situations and you are done!. .......Thanks and keep fate.
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